Burst Out into Tears this Evening (T_T)

Lord,

I just saw him this night while I'm waiting for someone in the tricycle terminal to accompany me to get into the subdivision for half-a-fare ride. Unfortunately, he just passed in front of me as if he has not seen anyone. I felt I'm an air for him. I believe he saw me and I'm 100% sure of it. I'm pretty sure! But, as he passes quickly in front of me and while my eyes are following where he would go not missing a glimpse of him, I felt how he was so hurt. I felt the large gap, the pang between us and I concluded that he is totally angry and bitter with me. I dunno if this was just all about what I think I feel, but with all the hot and spicy words I've thrown to him via this blog and other shoutout networks, I fiercely stabbed him with sharp and double-edged statements which made a deep bloody wound in his heart and especially in his ego as a man. I badly crave in approaching him that time, honestly. However, walking away and snobbing me clearly signifies that he does not want to talk to me and he does not have anytime for a pig like me. YES! I realized... I am the pig playing in the mud which I'm always mentioning in my previous arrogant posts. Inside the tricycle, tears fell from eyes.

This weekend (3-day vacation), I reflected. There's really something wrong that affects everything in me. One of these is our friendship -- friendship that has been broken; friendship that has been lost. I realized how arrogant and highly I am having a ton of guts and a thick face putting him down when I should help him forget me for a purpose. I realized how self-centered I am focusing only on myself, fighting for what I believe will make me win, and blaming him for hurting me. I am so insensitive, not knowing what he really feels, thinks, and wants to say. I've been so close-minded and inconsiderate about his point. I believe he has his point but I dunno how I would know that. I'm definitely eager to know his side, but...

I dunno where to start.
I dunno how I will approach him. :((
I dunno how would things be alright between us.

Please give me an answer, Lord.

I admit I've been a pain-in-the-ass and a stumbling block for my brother.

So, sorry. (i_i)

I'm looking forward to how You would make our friendship stronger than before.

And I'm looking forward to how we may glorify You having a mature and godly attitude towards dealing with each other and focusing on Your expectations to us as Your son & daughter and not on wasting our youthful time on untimely and immature expectations for each other.

You said in Exodus 3:5 that we should "Take off our sandals." Help us, Lord to forget ourselves and selfish desires and reasoning. You also said in Ephesians 4 that in our anger we should not sin. We should not let the sun go down while we are still angry. Sorry, Lord, if the words that I dropped for him have not been helpful for building & encouraging him. Lord, help us to get rid of all our bitterness, rage and anger with each other. And bring the spirit of kindness and compassion for each other, forgiving just as You forgave us.

Help us to manifest Your Words, Lord. May we glorify You as we open our hearts for FORGIVENESS. Amen.

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Dear Spongebob,

Sorry.
I hope we would have time to have a serious & professional talk.
I'll make it up to you. Please. [fingers crossed]

Sincerely,
Ms. Krusty Crab (-.-)